I am up for hire.
I will write whatever you need me to: lists, manifestos, jokes, song lyrics, break-up letters, kids books, directions to a made up place, campy dialogue for a satirical film, poems, post-it love notes, rants/raves, declarations, eulogies, essays, commencement addresses, one act plays, grant proposals, tankas, blurbs, blog posts, re-imagined bible verses, test questions, explanations of paintings you have not painted yet, acrostics, sermons, your course syllabus, screenplays, obituaries, speeches, you get the idea.
Prices negotiable.
Can this be a job please.
P.S. I’m totally serious.
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